Monday, July 14, 2014

Real Talk: The Newlywed Game

This is not a post about the TV game show, but about actually figuring out life in the first year of marriage. Exhibit A: Man & woman who met online, dated for 7 months, engaged for 6, and thus far married for 7 months, and expecting a baby before the one year anniversary.... also known as us.

I mean, seriously. Babeatron.
This thought occurred to me after waking up in the morning and waiting for his Royal Cuteness to wake up as well. I savor the mornings with him: we're not rushing around getting ready, stressed about the workday, cleaning up after dinner, planning tomorrow's activities, or distracted by the computer or TV. Because I usually crash at night before Joel, that leaves the time between when the alarm goes off in the morning and when we are forced to get up as my guaranteed, uninterrupted time with the love of my life and 100% of our attention is on each other. My thought process each morning is usually something like, "He's taking too long to wake up, do I have to get up before him? What if he had a horrible nights sleep and it'd just make his morning worse to wake up without me there? Can I get ready without waking him up from the noise? How do I pick out clothes in the dark? Will he want breakfast? What if it's cold by the time he wakes up? ....I should just stay here and wait."

This usually ends in me running late for whatever I was getting up for, but I still can't force myself to get out of bed on time to save my life. I'm assuming this is a common thing and I'm not merely a sap.

Dilemma #2: Separations for more than the workday. With Joel's new job, he'll be traveling for a weekend or two, up to a week, once or twice throughout the month. It hasn't happened yet (he only started there a few weeks ago), and I'm already planning 6947694437 things to do to keep myself occupied in his stead. I'm still not totally used to being with him all the time, but that's a good thing! It's new, fresh, and special, especially with our duet becoming a trio in t-minus 8 weeks (give or take). Do I feel silly telling him I've missed him at the end of a busy day with zero communication since he left? Most of the time, yes. Does it matter in the end? No. He's still getting used to coming home to more than his pet rabbit... and he probably likes it (Update: I asked him, and he does).

I'm working on a list of budget date night ideas, but this post is more or less me sharing my side of what looks like mere sappiness as a result of watching a billion romantic comedies in my lifetime. There is a method to my madness people; I see logic here.

I guess what I'm trying to get at is there is a lot of pressure on us to hurry up and be adults. We're married, starting a family, looking into home-ownership, working at jobs with actual vacation policies instead of summer breaks (well, he's working, but you get my point). We're still newlyweds and kids at heart, and I think that's ok. I'm no expert for for all of you other young newlyweds with big grown-up changes in the first year, I think it's ok to still be newlyweds. Build your blanket forts with courage. Send flirty texts to your spouse with no fear. We're still trying to figure it out. Who isn't?

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